Many Parents in Denial About Teen Sex

A sociology professor from North Carolina State University recently completed a survey in which she discovered that few parents believe their sons and daughters are engaging in premarital sex.

These parents know that many teenagers are sexually active, but they think the active ones are other people's kids.

In other words, the parents hold seemingly contradictory thoughts about teens and sex: Everyone else's kids are hypersexual, but theirs are way too innocent to even be interested.

For example, Elliott interviewed one mother who had, in the past few years, caught her 16-year-old son smoking dope, drinking alcohol and watching porn, [and] told Elliott that she believes her son is a virgin. [Source: Green Bay (WI) Press Gazette]

A total of 65 parents were interviewed for the study, and attitudes were remarkably similar. Though broad conclusions about the population-at-large can’t be drawn from such a small group, it does raise some flags regarding parental attitudes about teens and sex.

Expert Advises Against Micro-Managing, Over-Protecting Children

All parents have moments when they are tempted to micro-manage their children's lives – offer praise for the most basic accomplishments, schedule every moment of free time, and anxiously prevent them from climbing trees or racing bicycles because they might get hurt.

But at least one expert believes that all the hyper-vigilance isn’t helping our kids:

"It's sobering and startling to look at how parents' well-meant intentions -- to help their kids in any way possible -- may actually be backfiring, instead creating a generation of kids who are depressed and anxious, who lack self confidence and coping skills." [Source: The Calgary Herald]

Canadian television producer Maria LeRose has created a documentary called Hyper Parents & Coddled Kids that explores the effects so-called "helicopter parenting" has on children. The documentary will air Thursday, July 22 on CBC and includes commentary from several experts.

Expert Advises: Listen to Your Teen

As children grow into teenagers, a gulf between parent and child seems to grow as well. Many parents of teenagers have the same challenge – talking to their teens. But there are ways to get more than just mono-syllabic responses from your teenager.

In a July 10 article on www.christianpost.com, Mark Gregston advises parents to make a concerted effort to remain connected with their teens by listening to them:

All teens want to do is talk and have someone listen to them. If a teen shares what is on her heart, and that is missed by a parent more concerned about the delivery of the message than the heart of the communication, that teen will eventually quit sharing. If your teen is in the shutdown mode, there is a reason. And the reason may be that you aren't listening to what's being said anyway.

Most kids want to say, "My parents listened to me, and they heard me and they valued me." For your kid to say that, I'd say you are moving toward perfection. If you are willing to just listen, you might touch the heart of your teen and convey a sense of value. Don't worry about your answer, just focus on listening as your teen shares their heart.

If you've been a bad listener, keep working at it, and share your desire to be a better listener. Find opportunities for your teen to talk, even it seems a bit forced at first. Eventually, with diligence on your part, your teen will again learn to trust their dreams, thoughts and questions with you.

Too Much Texting Linked to Health Risks Among Teens

Your daughter's text-messaging habit may be more problematic than simply distracting her during dinner.

Teenagers who text too much can develop symptoms of nervousness, lack of confidence, low self-esteem, and sadness, according to a new study from RMIT University.

Researcher Jennie Carroll, author of the study, named some of the disorders created by excessive texting as Textiety, Binge Texting, Textaphrenia, and Post-Traumatic Text Disorder. Some teens develop "repetitive thumb syndrome," and their thumbs actually get bigger in response too much text messaging.

Weight Problems Don't Doom Girls to Depression

A study of more than12,700 teenagers found that the majority of the overweight ones were aware they were too heavy. However, being an overweight teen was not necessarily associated with depression, which was the object of the study from Pennsylvania State University.

Researchers found that normal weight girls who believe they are overweight and underweight boys are the ones most likely to be depressed.

"Parents often worry about overweight girls' mental health, but our findings show that is girls who have a healthy weight but perceive themselves as being overweight are most likely to feel depressed," according to the report published in the Journal of Health and Social Behavior.

Study Documents Excessive Screen Time Among Teens

A study out of the Toronto Centre for Addiction and Mental Health found that, on average, teenagers spend seven hours a day in front of T.V. and computer screens.

The study does not make a direct causal link between screen time – or "sedentary behavior," as it is sometimes called – and health issues. But in an interview, Dr. Mann said it's no coincidence that various indicators of physical health are simultaneously on the decline." [Source: The Globe and Mail]

Public health officials recommend that children under two spend no time at all in front of a television or computer, and that children older than two limit their screen time to just two hours.

If your daughter is spending too much time in front of the computer or television, know that there are a number of ways you can reduce your child's screen time.

Parents: Don't Delay, Have 'The Talk' Today

Have you had "the talk" with you teenager yet? If you're like most parents, you haven't. Sex can an awkward, difficult topic to discuss, especially with a teen. But America has a higher rate of teen pregnancy than any other industrialized nation -- so the topic is important.

"Share your own morals and values on this subject with your teen. Talk about consequences, responsibility, love, decision-making and communication skills. And if you get cold feet, remember that the media and the entertainment industry already have communicated their views to your child.” [Source: Mercury News (San Jose, CA)]

Someone is going to teach our adolescents about sex. If parents don't teach them, then friends, movies, and music videos will. It's a conversation that will make both you and your teenager uncomfortable, but you'll both get through it.

Medical Group Says Teen Girls May Need Two Annual Checkups

An annual physical is standard for both children and adults. But a committee from the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists is recommending that girls also get a second, reproductive health visit.

The group recommends a girl have her first visit with an ob-gyn between the ages of 13 and 15. The visit should be primarily educational and a chance to establish a relationship with the doctor, according to the paper.

Topics of discussion should include puberty, menstruation, healthy eating habits and sexual orientation. The discussion, with a parent, should cover patient confidentiality. [Source: The Day (CT)]

This early introduction would help teen girls learn how to navigate the health care system and hopefully put them at ease regarding ob-gyn visits.

Drug Risk Rises Among Teen Girls

A new study from the Partnership for a DrugFree America finds that teenage girls are more likely to abuse drugs and alcohol than are teenage boys.

Teenage girls are more likely to perceive benefits from alcohol and drug use. In fact, close to 70 percent of teenage girls agreed that "using drugs helps kids deal with problems at home," the survey shows.

This is up 11 percent from a similar survey conducted in 2008. More than half of teenage girls surveyed said that drugs can also help them forget about their problems. [Source: WebMD Health News]

The study also found that 11 percent more teenage girls were using alcohol, compared to just a 2 percent increase among teenage boys. In addition, marijuana use increased among teen girls by nearly twice as much as among teenage boys.

No Summer Job for Your Daughter? Explore Other Options

Grace's daughter, Stephanie, wanted a summer job. She applied to retail stores, restaurants and fast-food franchises. Her fruitless search had Grace worried. If Stephanie couldn't find a job, what would she do all summer?

Fortunately, Stephanie felt the same way. One afternoon, after another unfruitful job search, she decided to sell baked goods at the Saturday morning farmer’s market. ... A potentially boring and frustrating summer (for teen and parent alike) became an opportunity for her to learn new skills and earn money in the process. [Source: Crosswalk.com]

There are other options as well, for teens who can't find work and need something to occupy their time until school starts. A summer camp leadership program could help your child improve her skills as a leader. Volunteering the community won't earn her any money, but will give her a sense of purpose and teach her the importance of giving back.

Exercise During Teen Years May Stave Off Dementia Later in Life

Women who were physically active as teenagers have lower rates of dementia in their old age, according to a study from the University of California in San Francisco.

• Dr. Laura Middleton analyzed data from 9,704 women aged 65 years or older to understand their levels of physical activity as teenagers and at ages 30 and 50 years old.
  
• While those who are physically active at age 30 and 50 have lower rates of dementia, only teenage physical activity was significantly associated with cognitive performance in old age.
  
• Dr. Middleton adjusted for factors such as age, education, diabetes, hypertension, depression, smoking, and weight.

The study appeared in the journal of the American Geriatrics Society.